Never Give Up Hope
by Bajita
Summary: He's the youngest in the Pack and as the years pass, he still hasn't found his imprint. A walk on the beach changes everything….or does it? Set several years post BD2, Collin/OC, AH, Rating T
1. Chapter 1

**Never Give Up Hope**

**Chapter 1**

(Page Break)

**Collin**

The waves wash up against the shore at his feet but he doesn't seem to even notice. His mind is a million miles away. Collin had finished patrol once again and he's walking along the beach trying to calm his mind before heading home. He couldn't go straight home after a busy night of chasing vampires. His parents wouldn't understand why he was burning up to the touch or why his eyes had a bit of a yellow hue. His wolf still lingered at the surface so he had learned to take an hour or so to relax before heading in. However, lately, his wolf didn't want to let go of him after he phased back. If anything, it was quite the opposite; he was beginning to claw at the surface wanting more, but Collin couldn't figure out what that was.

After the incident with the Volturi, life on the Res had become much calmer and time carried on, weeks turned into months and even years. There was still the occasional nomad vampire that would unknowingly wander onto the Tribal lands but the Pack had grown to the point that there were more than enough Protectors to cover the shifts. This left Collin with more free time on his hands and a restless wolf to deal with. Most of the older members of the Pack had settled into imprint bliss with happy homes, weddings and a couple of children on the way, but not Collin. He felt as though Life had moved on without him. He had no one to call his own.

As he kicked the random rock along the shore, he ran through his short comings once again in his head. He wasn't the largest wolf in the Pack. He was shy and unassuming, prone to staying at the edge of the group rather than in the middle. He had a stutter that he felt was his stumbling block. It got in the way anytime he tried to talk, but it was worse whenever he tried to talk to a girl. How would he ever find his Imprint if he couldn't even talk to her? Sighing, he sits down in the sand, ignoring the soothing sound of the waves, lost in his own thoughts.

(page break)

**Raven**

When she was given the chance to get off of the Res by graduating high school early, she jumped on the opportunity. Raven went off to Seattle to study art at the University of Washington with the belief that she would never again return to the Res. She wouldn't look back. Her life there had been filled with confusion and heartbreak. She wanted, no needed with every fiber of her being, to move on with her life, to find herself.

As a child, Raven had always been the shyest of them all. She could very easily stay in a corner drawing and coloring, ignoring the world around her, safe in the made up world in her imagination. Her mother had died when she was four and unable to truly cope with the loss, Raven had withdrawn from the world and had no real desire to rejoin it. If it weren't for Aunt Sue who helped raise her alongside her own children Leah and Seth, Raven would have happily spent the rest of her life in her room, locked away from everyone and everything.

As time passed, Raven grew into an introverted teenager who rarely spoke to anyone outside of her family. She kept her head buried in her artwork so that she wouldn't have to interact with anyone with other than her art teacher who eventually convinced her to submit her work to U of WA. Much to their surprise, she had been accepted into the program and was on her way to the escape that she desperately felt she needed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Never Give Up Hope**

**CHAPTER 2**

The evening that she received the phone call, the World stopped spinning for her. It was so sudden, so fast, so out of left field that all she could do was sit on the couch and stare out into space, trying to wrap her head around what Aunt Sue had just told her. This couldn't happen. He would have mentioned it to her. Wouldn't he? The better part of an hour passes before she finally stands up and walks into the kitchen. Her motions are like that of a zombie, devoid of any real energy or emotion. When did this all start? How did it end? What do I do? Standing in her apartment looking out over the skyline of Seattle, she begins to wonder when did she lose all contact with them. What do I do now?

The next morning, she calls her boss to explain why she had to take a sudden leave of absence. Yes, she would be coming back. She had a fantastic job at that graphic design firm. Raven had worked hard to get through college and had been offered the job almost the second after she crossed the stage with her diploma in hand. She was fast, efficient and creative. The Lawson Design Firm immediately brought her into the world that she had always dreamed of. She had a boss that was very pleased with her work, a corner office that she had just moved into with her last promotion and a really nice salary. She had recently moved into her apartment. It was on the "right" side of town, full of windows, light, and a great view of the city. According to some, she had it all.

Then why did she feel so empty?

( )

A week has passed in a blur of activities, motions and people who came to see her. Why did they feel the need to talk to her? She hadn't set foot on this Res in years and out of the blue, she found herself surrounded by family and friends. They told her that everything happened as it should have, that they were happy to see that she had come back home. Was she happy to be back on Tribal land? Was this her home?

The crowds of people had finally dispersed. The arrangements were finished. All that was left was her childhood home and the memories it held. She sits in the living room, staring at the walls, looking at the pictures of her mom and dad, of her as a baby. In her mind, she sees her dad standing in the kitchen trying to fix dinner. She sees the corner that held the Christmas tree every year, but regardless of how hard her dad tried, the Holidays never felt right. There was a hole in their family that neither of them would discuss. Suddenly she stands. With every passing second, the walls of her childhood home felt as though they were closing in on her, suffocating her, forcing her to face feelings that she had intentionally pushed to the furthest corner of her mind, to be ignored and washed over.

Barging out the front door, she heads for the beach to escape the overwhelming feelings that surrounded her. Tears threatened as she walked out onto the sands of her youth. She had spent countless hours there while growing up. Aunt Sue had tried so hard to include her in the pic nics, trips to the beach, and other activities, but she always felt like she was on the outside looking in at something that could never be hers, as if she didn't belong.

Her feet lead her to one particular rock, the only place in which she felt any real connection to her real family, her mother's rock. Well, it didn't really belong to her mother but it was the only place where she had a memory of her family when it was whole, when they were happy. At around the age of 14, she had found a video recording of her with her mom and dad at this very beach, playing and laughing. There was a portion of the video of her building a sand castle with her mom right in front of this very rock. She was around 4 years old. They were all joking around. Everyone was smiling. It was the last time her mom was ever captured on video or photograph. It was the last time that her family was complete.

As if drawn by a magnet, she walks toward the rock just like she had in her teenage years. She crawled up on top of it to talk her mother as she had done countless times when her head was filled with emotions that she couldn't understand. Raven would explain her problems and angst believing that her mom was listening and occasionally a warm breeze would whip through her hair. She liked to believe that was her mother's response to her questions.

She had lost all track of time as she sat there whispering to her mother, letting her emotions go on the wind, when she looked up to see him walking towards her. Although she had been taught to be polite, to say hello, Raven stayed where she was, tears streaming down her face and lost in her own pain.

()

Walking along what should have been a well worn path; Collin takes his usual stroll to cool down before heading home. He had been giving thought to moving out of his parents place but his insecurities would raise their ugly head, usually stopping him right before he walks into their house to talk to them about it. He kicks a rock in frustration. He turns to watch the waves for a moment. On the wind, he catches the scent of salt…of tears. Looking a little further down the beach, he sees her, alone on her rock. For some reason, he feels compelled to see if she's ok. He heads in her direction.

He stands at a distance, just watching. She was a Quileute that much was obvious by her skin tone and hair. She was also average height and on the thin side. The breeze shifts and her scent hits him. He could smell her pain, her tears and her fear. Carefully so that he wouldn't startle her, he approaches.

"Um…h-h-hi. Are y-y-you new to th-th-the res?" he asks her. His hands jammed into his pockets, trying to cover his nervousness. Even though she was obviously upset and hurting, she was still a girl. He waits patiently for her answer.

She shakes her head and sniffles. "No, I'm not. I've just not been here for a very long time." Her head comes up and he finds himself looking at a pair of beautiful chocolate brown eyes. Her face was tear stained and there was a slight tremor to her voice.

Collin takes a step closer, making his nerves jump again. "Are y-y-you hurt or do y-y-you need s-something? Can I h-h-h-help you?" He realizes that his stuttering is getting worse around her. He looks down at his feet, cursing the fact that he's never been able to have the simplest of conversations with someone and this girl needed his help.

"I'll be ok. I've a lot on my mind is all." She shrugs. "I don't know what to do with the mess that I've found myself in." Pulling her knees up to her chin, she wraps her arms around them, as if trying to hold herself together.

Taking yet another step closer, he watches her. "H-h-hi, I'm C-collin L-l-litlesea." He smiles shyly at her.

The wind whips her hair again, causing her to have to push her hair back from her face. "Hi Collin, I'm Raven Uley."

His head pops up. "U-u-uley? Are y-y-you related t-to S-s-s-sam U-uley?"

"We're very distant cousins. It's been ages since I saw him." She swallows back some emotions. "I haven't lived here on the res for a little over 6 years. I don't know if I would recognize him if I saw him."

"W-w-w-what made you come back?" His curiosity is peaked.

"My father died. I came to take care of the arrangements." She sighs, sniffling.

He thinks for a moment. Lucas Uley. Nodding, he remembered hearing something through the Pack of his passing, but why didn't anyone mention her? Collin scratches the back of his head, mostly out of habit. "What are you going to do now?" He lets his gaze wander across the water, noticing that the sky is getting dark. Night time would be on them soon. She can't stay out here alone.

"I don't know. I've some decisions to make." She sighs in resignation. "I don't know what to do with the house that I just inherited and there's some lose ends in dealing with his medical bills that I need to take care of. I don't know what to do about my work either." She looks at him, really looks at him, and notices that he's a very handsome man, but she's not interested so she shrugs.

Collin nods, still looking at the water and listening to her. "Y-y-y-you need to t-t-t-take your time, not r-r-rush things." The wind picks up as the sky gets darker. His brow furrows. She can't stay out here much longer. "G-g-g-gonna get cold q-q-q-quick out h-h-here now. Y-y-you need to h-h-h-head home." He looks down, frustrated with himself.

"I can't go back to the house yet. I need to get away from it a while longer. It hurts too much." She closes her eyes, wishing that her childhood home wasn't now filled with so many sad memories. Raven shivers as another blast of wind hits her.

Thinking fast, he understood the need to be away from it all but she would get sick for sure if she stayed out here on the beach much longer. "H-h-how about a s-s-s-sm-small bonfire to k-k-keep you w-warm? I c-c-could build it-it for y-y-you." Collin turns to look at her, sees her shivering and becomes determined.

She pushes her hair from her face again with a sigh. "I'd like that if you don't mind. I want to stay out here until I get sleepy so that I can maybe finally get some rest."

"Alr-r-right…" He gets to work collecting some driftwood, finding a slightly sheltered area to build it, and stacking it properly. In no time, he had a nice bonfire built for her. "H-h-h-here you go." Collin holds his hand up for her to help her down.

Raven takes it hesitantly and hops down off of her rock. Walking over to the fire, she sits down, not caring that the sand could ruin her clothes. Her mind was numb from everything that she had gone through. She wraps her arms around her knees and stares at the flames allowing it to relax her.

He sits down near the fire a few feet away. Noticing that she zoned out watching the flames flicker, he took an opportunity to look at her more closely. He saw that she was truly beautiful. His mind wanders to what it would be like to see her laugh and smile, to not be so sad. His hands wanted to reach out to comfort her but he knew that would be pushing things so instead, he sat with her quietly, letting her cry out her grief. As the better part of an hour passes, her eyes go heavy and she looks like she's about to fall over from exhaustion.

"H-h-hey Raven…why d-don't you let me t-t-take you h-home? You n-need to go to b-b-bed."

Her eyes open. She fights past the exhaustion just enough to see the logic in his words. Raven nods. "Ok…" she tries to stand but she's too tired.

Quick on his feet, he helps her up. "I-I've got y-y-you. Point m-m-me to y-y-your house." Noting the direction that she points, Collin picks her up in his arms easily, kicks sand over the fire to put it out and carries her home. Between her exhaustion and his elevated body warmth, she quickly falls fast asleep in his arms. The front door was unlocked so he let them in and gently lays her on the couch. He takes off her shoes and covers her with a blanket. Allowing himself a moment of indulgence, he brushes her hair from her face as he smiles at her. He whispers "I'll s-s-ssee you tomorrow R-r-r-raven Uley." before he lets himself out, making sure that the front door was locked tight.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Stefanie Meyers owns the characters from Twilight, not me. :)**

**Chapter 3**

The next morning, there's a knock on my door. I wake to find myself laying on the couch in the living room and a quilt tucked around me. Giving my head a shake, I sit up, trying to remember how I got here. Then, I remember the bonfire and the nice guy….Collin…yeah, that's his name.

The knock sounds again so I get up yawning, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I open the door to see the same guy standing in front of me, smiling, with a basket in his hands. "Um….hi." Leaning against the door frame, I watch him. For his size, he seems so nervous to be standing in front of me.

"M-m-m-mornin' R-r-raven. I-I-I thought I-I w-w-would ch-check up on-on you. I-I br-br-brought y-y-you some br-breakfast." He holds the basket up. It's filled with fresh muffins and juice. "I-I talked m-m-mom into m-making th-them f-f-for us."

I can't help but smile at him. He's being sweet. I hold the door open. "Come on in. Eat with me." I don't care much for being in the house alone anyway.

We spend the next hour or so just talking about the reservation, finding common ground in the teachers at the school, getting to know each other. I find it relaxing to simply talk to him, to hang out with someone who just wanted to be a friend. We manage to eat about half of the muffins and finish off a gallon of OJ, which is more than I've eaten at any one time since I arrived.

"H-h-how about w-we go on a-a-a w-walk later th-this afternoon? Maybe d-d-d-down to L-La Push?" Collin asks with a shy smile. I think he could turn into a true friend if I give him the opportunity. I couldn't tell him no.

Nodding my agreement, I finish my last bite of muffin. "I'd like that. I need to work for a bit this morning. I have to finish a project. How about one o'clock?" He smiles brightly at my answer and I notice his eyes again. They're a deep chocolate brown with little flecks of gold.

After Collin leaves, I shower and put on my comfy pjs with a t-shirt so that I can get down to work. I manage to finish up the project by 11:30, leaving me plenty of time to eat lunch and then get super-nervous myself. It's just a walk on the beach. What's the big deal? After a quick phone call to my office back in Seattle, I allow myself to actually explore my childhood home.

When I lived here before, I never wanted to know the world beyond my own bedroom, my personal sanctuary where nothing could hurt me. With the exception of when I was with Aunt Sue because dad was working, I spent hours upon hours sitting on my bed or at my window drawing and sketching. I had no desire to really discover all of the nooks and crannies in the house. I find the door leading to the attic. In a moment of bravery, I climb the stairs to find neatly stacked boxes, each labeled with the year, each holding a collection of my childhood photos and old school papers. I looked around a bit more and then, I found it, my mom's wedding dress. I allow myself a quiet cry as the realization of how much I have lost now that both of my parents are gone. What does my life have to offer me now? A cold yet posh apartment in a busy, loud life style. All of that was nothing that I felt truly belonged to me. Where do I really belong?

I open another box to find some really old photos of me as a kid. I'm standing beside a very young Leah and an even littler Seth, playing on the tire swing behind the Clearwater house. I look through more photos and find more faces that I remember from the funeral, the Blacks, the Atearas and the Camerons. I smile at some of the silliness captured in these pictures. I find myself wanting what I once had here. Finally, I understand. I have been running away from the one thing that I need the most. I need connection and I need a rock, stability. Dad never knew how to give me that given that his own life, his own heart, had been shaken to the core with mom's death. He never recovered. It was our extended family that had reached out to me, helping me to hold on. They never faltered. They were ever present.

Maybe I needed to stop being in such a rush to get off of the reservation. Maybe I need to reconsider giving up my family home. Maybe it was time to stop running. Looks like I have more things to think about before returning to Seattle.

Walking back downstairs with one of my old art portfolios in my hands, the phone starts ringing, pulling me out of my thoughts. I answer to find Ana, the person that I had been talking to at the hospital that's in charge of billing, on the line, telling me that the last of the outstanding medical charges have been covered by dad's insurance. Ana had been nice enough to help me work through the bills, and insurance red tape. She had recently lost her sister to cancer herself so she was well aware of how overwhelming this whole thing is. Nodding, I give her my thanks and sit on the couch. I put my portfolio on the coffee table and look around the house. Well, I didn't have to sell the house to cover dad's bills. It's paid off completely and it's mine.

* * *

Promptly at one o'clock, I hear another knock at my door. Opening it up, I see a smiling and still nervous Collin. He has changed his clothes and it looks as though he has recently showered. "Come on in, Collin. I just need to grab my shoes and keys." He lets himself in as I go back to my bedroom.

Gremlins must have taken off with my sandals because it took me a good ten minutes to find them. How could they have been so far back beneath my bed? I walk back out to the living room to find Collin looking at my old portfolio that I had left open on the coffee table.

"Wh-who drew th-th-these?" He points to the pictures on the open page. Those were my earliest sketches from when I was finally beginning to consider myself a serious artist. I sit down in front of the portfolio to put on my shoes.

"Those? I drew them when I was in the eighth grade I think." I answer. He's looking at the colored ones closely, like he recognizes something about the drawings themselves.

"Why d-d-did you o-only draw w-w-wolves? Wh-why not b-b-bears or hawks?" He looks up at me with a curious glimmer in his eyes.

I shrug as I slip on my other shoe. "I don't know. I became obsessed with them at a young age. Maybe it was from listening to the legends about our tribe's protectors?" Shaking my head, I stand and start looking for my keys.

"You d-d-drew this p-p-particular wolf over a-a-and over." He points to a reddish brown wolf with a smile on his face. I notice how his face has lights up as he relaxes into our once again easy conversation.

Flipping to the next page, I show him even more renditions of that same wolf. "I know. I had a thing for his particular look, especially his fur. Chuckling, I point to one particular drawing of that wolf howling at the moon, tracing my finger over it. "I think I must have reworked this one a dozen times before I decided it was the way it should be. "

Collin nods. "H-h-he's well d-d-done." Standing up next to me, I realize just how tall he is. He's immense standing beside me and I'm not short. "Are-are y-y-y-you ready?" He takes a step towards the door.

"I am. " I grab my keys as I follow him out the door. He waits for me to lock up before we head off down the path to the beach. Our walk is really nice with the birds singing and squirrels skittering in the trees. I give in a little and allow myself to just look at the scenery around me, letting Collin lead the way.

Suddenly, I feel a pair of warm hands on my waist just as I trip over an exposed root. I look away from the squirrels to see that Collin stood in front of me holding me upright. He's standing very close to me and smiling, really smiling. I can see the gold flecks in his eyes again and a bit of something more but I'm not really sure what it is.

"Y-y-you ok?" He helps me right myself but doesn't pull his hands away immediately. I admit to myself that this feels sort of nice. He inhales deeply and his smile grows. "You smell really nice."

"I'm good. Thanks." I give him a goofy smile, realizing that I look like a complete klutz at the moment. "You probably got a good whiff of my shampoo. It's orchid scented."

"O-orchids." He nods like he's memorizing that fact. "Do y-y-you d-d-do that o-often?" He asks with a goofy grin on his face as he gestures to the root that tripped me. He allows me to take a step or two ahead of him to break the awkwardness.

"Um…no…not really." I chuckle softly. "Then again, I haven't walked in these woods like this in a very long time." We walk out of the woods and down onto the all too familiar beach. The tide is out so there's a vast expanse of sand in front of us and a soft breeze brings the scent of the salty water to my nose. I stop beside a large rock to slip my shoes off and he stops in front of me.

"W-w-well, you sh-should. I-I could see-see the l-l-little g-girl in you-you for a-a-a moment." His face is soft as he watches me closely, like he's searching for something. I don't get the feeling of uneasiness that I normally get when a guy gets too close to me. I know that he's no threat to me. I trust him.

Rather than saying something completely stupid, I look down the beach. "Want to walk in the waves with me?" I hold out my hand to him. He looks hesitant for a moment, and then takes my hand. We walk along water, talking about little things before a noise interrupts us.

"She lives!" I turn to see Seth running towards me with his usual dopey happy grin. He pulls me into a hug, spinning me around. There's another guy with an amused look on his face standing off at a short distance. "I've been waiting for you to come out and play Rae." Seth kisses my cheek before he puts me down.

"Is Collin behaving himself?" He asks in a teasing manner. Apparently they know each other given the playful glint in his eyes.

"Why yes he is so leave him be." I stick out my chin in my normal defiant manner. Seth always loved to tease me as a kid even though I was older than him by several years. That fact never stopped him though. It's just part of his nature.

"Rae, this is a friend of mine, Brady Fuller." He gestures over to the guy with the amused look, who walks over to us. He has a confidence about him that you could almost feel and a spring in his step.

"Hello there Raven, nice to meet you." Taking a step closer to me, his eyes look over me like I'm some tasty treat. I step back away out of habit. Collin puts himself in between me and Brady and I swear I heard a low growl coming from him. I lay a hand on his shoulder as Seth breaks the tension.

"We're headed back over to Jake's place in a few to watch the Mariner's game if you want to join us." Seth offers. I could feel the tension in Collin's hand that still held mine. He hasn't moved. His eyes are still trained on Brady.

"Thanks but I think I'll call it an early night. I'm really tired." I give Collin's hand a light squeeze, trying to pull him back to the present from wherever he had gone. "Maybe, some other time." I smile at Seth. He nods and walks away with Brady, who waves at me, his eyes alive with amusement. I wait until they have left the beach before I speak to Collin.

"Hey….are you ok Collin?" He blinks a couple of times with a look of confusion on his face. As quickly as I had noticed his confusion, it was gone. He smiles at me.

"Y-y-yeah, I'm f-f-fine. There's just a little bit of bad blood between me and Brady." He shrugs it off, a move that looks a little too practiced. Reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a couple of pieces of candy. "L-Laffy Taffy?" He holds one out to me. I notice that there's a large amount of banana flavored candies. Picking out a strawberry, he grins at me. "I-I love ba-banana flavored c-c-c-andies." He unwraps one and pops it in his mouth. Stuffing the wrapper in his other pocket, he finally relaxes.

We spend the next couple of hours down at the beach, talking and watching the water. I've never able to just talk to anyone close to my own age like I can with him. It was an easy sort of afternoon, no stress and no pressure. The more we talk, the more we learn about each other, and I begin to see another connection forming to the reservation. He might be a reason to stay.


End file.
